Monday, October 27, 2008

McCain's Momentum

by Michael Bouchard

With the presidential race ticking down to its final days John McCain seems bent on losing by the largest margin possible and everyone around him seems very intent on helping.

For instance, his brother, in an attempt to sway 911 and emergency workers to the cause, cussed out the 911 operator that he had called to complain about traffic.

One of his campaign volunteers has been found to have made up her story that a big black Obama supporter attacked her at an ATM and carved a "B" into her face. The story fell apart when she never showed up on the ATM security cameras and the "B" was carved backwards. Just like you'd expect from someone who carved it in a mirror. There is a moral to this story. Friends don't let friends carve letters into their faces to create a racially charged, political fraud alone.

Trooper-gate still haunts Palin, who claimed when the report came out to have done no wrong, even when the report came out and stated the she had in fact used her power unethically. Palin's argument was to say that there wasn't a particular law against her unethical actions and thus, her actions weren't wrong. Just unethical. So everything is fine...

Except for the fact that when answering a 3rd grader about what the VP does, she totally got it wrong, stating that she would lead the senate. Which she wouldn't. But her title is "President of the Senate" so say her supporters. As if that actually means she'd lead a damn thing. Calling the janitor "Grand High Sultan of Trump Tower" isn't going to fool the janitor. Palin shouldn't expect such nonsense to fool voters.

Follow this with her public and continual condemnation of money spent on fruit fly research. Sadly, she's ignorant of the fact that fruit fly research has led to advances in autism research. Not that she needs that research. She'll just pray that autism away, right?

Michelle Bachman put her foot in her mouth recently, calling for all senators to be investigated by the press to see if any are "anti-American". After getting raked over the coals for calling Obama "anti-American" she went onto Dennis Miller's radio show and only stated that he holds some views (What he says and does. You may know those as the things that make up your "Character") that are anti-American. So, what she's saying is that she shouldn't be held responsible for smearing what Obama says and does as anti-American, only that she thinks what he says and does is anti-American. I wonder if Bill Ayers isn't "anti-American" but only holds "anti-American views". I'll leave that as an exercise for the reader.

'Joe the plumber', John McCain's guy crush, was not only found to be not a plumber, but also under suspicion of shady tax proceedings. This all coming from a man who's claim to fame is bitching about the fact that his business, which would make more than $250,000, would be taxed more under Obama than under Bush. But as if to create even more of a silly circus, 'Joe the plumber', has spoken to newspapers about possibly running in 2010 for congress against a woman with a 75% approval rating and has already called his common republican economic ideas silly, seeing how far they've gotten us at the moment.

Lastly, the McCain campaign is still hammering away at Biden's claim that Obama will be tested if he becomes president. Their latest attack ad basically says, vote for McCain or we'll be bombed. This might be shrewd underdog politics if it weren't for the fact that it isn't. Just imagine the fact that Joe Lieberman back in June on Face the Nation, said the same damn thing! "Our enemies will test the new president early." I guess if Lieberman were to follow the McCain party line, he would now advise that in order to avoid the upcoming disaster, you simply shouldn't vote for president at all.

-MICHAEL BOUCHARD is still going to vote for president because he hates America.

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